Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Just A Little Anxious

Tomorrow is Iggy's court date. All indication points to the fact that he will stay in the foster care system for a minimum of 6 more months and come home with me, but that is completely up to a judge to decide in a few short hours.

Twenty-four hours ago I could honestly say that I was not nervous whatsoever about this court date. Just another appointment in Iggy's very booked schedule, after which we will leave for the Adirondacks for a ski holiday. Iggy in tow; or quite possibly not. Now I am a bit anxious.

Bringing home a new baby is an exciting time. But as a foster mother, your exitement is due to the fact that another woman is possibly in mental anguish over the knowledge that she just lost temporary custody of her newborn baby. This is not always the case, some birth mothers simply do not care, but it's hard to celebrate when that sobering fact is hanging out there like the proverbial pink elephant in the room.

I adore this baby boy. If asked, we would gladly adopt him. We would also accept graciously the fact that he goes back to his mother should that be the case. We really want whatever the Lord has planned for his life. Tonight however, I am torn. Do I have the kids say their good-byes to him in the morning, just in case? Do I pack all of his belongings, just in case? Do I prepare myself, just in case?

This, I was not ready for.


Heather_in_WI said...

{{{Hugs}}} Angel. Praying for you here.

Dawn said...

The court dates are so difficult. To be honest I never went to them. Mike always went and I was so grateful. He would come home with sad stories. I understand how you feel, I felt the same way thoughout our adoption.

If you are not required to bring Iggy to the court I would leave him with a sitter, that way the kids could say goodbye if it goes that way. Skyler and Michael never went to the court dates, but they were older.

I know this is difficult, I will be praying for you.


Carolyn said...

I'm praying